#!/usr/bin/perl 

#Whene'er I take my pipe and stuff it
#and smoke to pass the time away
#my thoughts as I sit here and puff it,
#Dwell on a picture sad and grey
#It teaches me that very like
#Am I myself unto my pipe

if ($I{hold} = my $pipe){true}
&smoke; sub smoke {sleep 5;}
my $thoughts; while($I{puff} = my $pipe)
{@Thoughts = "A picture","Sad","Grey";}
$I = "learn that as"; $one=$one;
$I = my $pipe;

#Like me, this pipe so fragrant burning
#Is made of naught but earth and clay;
#To earth I too shall be returning.
#It falls and, ere I'd think to say,
#it breaks in two before my eyes;
#In store for me a like fate lies. 

$pipe{smell} = "fragrant burning";
$pipe = 0+$earth.$clay;
$me = 0+$earth.$clay;
$soon; $earth = $me;
$pipe{acceleration} = (9.8)."m/s**";
$pipe = split //; my $eyes;
if ((@date=localtime(time))and($date[5]>200)){$me = $m.$e;}

#No stain the pipe's hue yet doth darken;
#It remains white. Thus do I know
#That when to death's call I must harken
#My body, too, all pale will grow.
#To black beneath the sod 'twill turn,
#Likewise the pipe, if oft it burn.

##</code><code>##

$stain=-0x111111;
$pipe{color}=0xFFFFFF;
if(($I eq "Dead")&&($I eq "Buried in sod"))
 {for(0..9){$body{color}-=$stain;}
 while($body{color}>0x000000){$body{color}+=$stain;}}
if (1){for (0..$pipe{times_smoked}/10) {$pipe{color}-=$stain;}}

#Or when the pipe is fairly glowing,
#Behold them instantaniously,
#The smoke off into thin air going,
#Till naught but ash is left to see.
#Man's frame likewise away will burn
#And unto dust his body turn.

while(($pipe{color} eq "orange")&&($pipe{luminosity} >= 1))
 {$observe; sleep 0;
  $thin_air = "The smoke";
  $thin_air = (0)."ash";  
  $body{man}=$thin_air=(0)."ash";
  $body{man} != "ash"; 
  $body{man} = "dust";
 }

#How oft it hapens when one is smoking:
#The stopper's missing from the shelf,
#And one goes with one's finger poking
#Into the bowl and burns oneself.
#If in the pipe such pain doth dwell,
#How hot must be the pains of Hell.

if (($date[0]>0)&&($date[0]<50)&&($smoke))
 {$stopper{location} = "!shelf";
push @bowl, $ones{finger};
print "Ouch!\n"}
if($pain{pipe}=2)
{for(1..256){$pain{Hell}=$pain{pipe}*=$pain{Hell};}}

#Thus o'er my pipe, in contemplation
#of such things, I can constantly
#indulge in fruitful meditation,
#And so, puffing contentedly,
#On land, on sea, at home, abroad,
#I smoke my pipe and worship God.

while($I){($smoke) and ($think);}
@thoughts = "Death","Hell","Pipes"; if (1) 
{$meditation{fruitful}="indulge";}
$I{puff}="content";
if(((my $locale = "On land") || ($locale = "At sea")) 
  ||((my $locale = "At home") || ($locale = "Abroad")))
 {$I; &smoke; (my $pipe) and ($worship = 1*1*1);}