I've been doing some thinking lately about my current position
on this site. To be honest, I'm starting to bore a bit...
Lots more info below. Lots of text babbling, so enter at your own risk!
How long have I been a monk on the site?
A quick look at my homenode suggests I started
my 'career' here March 31, 2000 at 5:20 PM central time.
That is the better half of 2 years. (ie: 2 years, 9 months)
So what? You've been around a while. Big whoop. What's your point?
My point is, I'm actually quite a veteran on perlmonks.
When I registered my username (at that time 'maleteen2000'),
there were only 470 top-level nodes. There are now 29773 of them.
Now really, what your point? Why did you post this node?
Well, after nearly 3 years of hanging around the Monastary,
I'm beginning to lose interest in the site. Why? Because I find
that I'm not contributing to the community as much as I would like.
Once again, big whoop! Post more nodes, write some modules!
Because I'll admit: even after being around the site for 3 years
and using Perl as much as I do, I'm nothing of a Perl guru.
So it's pure fantasy to believe that I can contribute by posting
answers to SoPW (besides the numerous newbie questions that pop up
every now and then).
Mmm... perhaps this is a small problem... why don't you fix it?
That's what I'm trying to do with this post.
A couple of months ago (I really can't recall exactly when)
I got myself promoted to being a member of the pmdev usergroup.
I was floating high when this happened, as I was happy to move up.
Sounds great! So why aren't you happy with being a pmdev member?
I love being part of the action behind the scenes, but pmdev
just isn't right for me. Like I said, I'm not a Perl guru.
So looking for things to improve on the site isn't such a good
place for me to be. I could always find new things to add to the
site, but I would have difficulties in implementing them. Besides,
I just don't find a lot of fun in looking for bugs in the system.
You're a liar! You've found bugs/problems before and exploited them!
Yes, no need to remind me of that. If I could go back and change one
thing, it would be to not exploit those things. I would have mentioned
them to others and helped work on a fix. There is one thing I stand by
in regards to anything and everything I did with these 'features':
I never made an attempt to do serious or permanent damage. Was what I
did annoying? Perhaps (ok, YES). Did it hurt anybody/anything? NO.
For the last time, get to the goddamn point!
Yes. To the point. Like I said above, I enjoy working behind the scenes.Okay... but isn't pmdev a "behind-the-scenes" group?
Rather than posting answers to others' questions, I prefer to do
maintenance. It's the same as at my real-world job. Right now, I'm
just like most of the other regular employees. But I've already got
my application in to be promoted to management, because I'd much
rather work behind the scenes of the place.
Yes is it. But just not the right kind of group for me.
As soon as I looked and read through what the editors group
does for a job here, my heart raced a little bit. It's what I want.
(Okay, I lie. I want to be higher than that, but it's unlikely to ever happen)
Reading New site editors, I laughed at the line that says:
High level (they've spent enough time and energy here to destroy their playground)
I find it funny, because I may not be such a high level (1343 XP), level 7,
but the second part of that sentence is true. You think that after nearly 3
years spent wandering the Monastary, I'd want to cause it any harm?
Um, but you've used new-found power for evil purposes before...
I admit it: yes I did. Though I'd say "in an unwise manner" as opposed to
"evil purposes". So why did I ever behave in those unwise things?
The best answer I can come up with from within myself is this: boredom.
I've never really done much around the Monastary and I still don't, because
in all honesty, there isn't much for me to do. So when I find something different
to do, I go ahead and do it, just to spice up my internet life a little bit.
As far as I can tell right now... no. It's my hope that it would give me a
little bit of soemthing else to do. It would give me a chance to actually
do something else on the site than use the CB and waiting for new 'features'
to appear. It might even let me make a tiny bit of a difference.
Nothing would make me happier than being lifted up to heaven and becoming
a member of these elite groups. But that's the problem.
Over the past couple of years, I've done numerous things that are apparently
horrible enough to hold me back. I was permitted to enter pmdev because at least
all I could do was look at code and dig through the source, as well as provide
patches that could maybe one day make it into the system. But I suppose the powers
that be were happy to let me in because I couldn't directly modify anything on the site.
As a matter of fact, I did make a request to be made an editor.
I was shut down immediately with an ".. not inclined to add you ... it's an elite group ..."
So I am stubborn enough to seek opinion from fellow monks (you).
Do you think I deserve to be promoted?
Do I deserve to be held back because of past stupidness?
Should I have to somehow prove (and how?) that I can do the job
without getting carried away and using the power for ruining things for everybody?
Yes, I have done some very stupid, selfish, childish, idiotic things here,
but I'd really rather look to the future instead of the past.
I'd really like to hear your opinions on this. Do it as Anonymous Monk if you must.
Any last comments before I vote you to death with --s?
Sure, just a few bits of information that I find ironic:
(Ironic because it's really my fault it's like this)
1. I have been a part of perlmonks longer than ~ 59% of the editors.
2. I have been a part of perlmonks longer than 60% of the power users.
3. I have been a part of perlmonks longer than 50% of the gods.
4. Indeed, I became a perlmonks user 3 1/2 months before the great tye did.
5. Those who have been here longer arrived between only 1 day and 4 months earlier than me.
Okay Nathan, quit your bitching and go away.
Okay fine. I'm hungry anyhow. BTW, how do you know my name?
Update: As for having posted the original thread in Meditations over PerlMonks Discussion, I debated putting it in Discussion, but decided against it as the post does not deal with perlmonks directly. It does, but it doesn't.