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Brothers and Sisters all. I have gone on a quest of my own devising. I have plunged into the _DEEPEST_ catacombs of the Monastery. I have been where few monks have been or even knew existed. I have seen things that chilled my bones. I have uncovered a DARK SECRET about the Monastery that will cause you perhaps to weep when you read it. I wondered what sorts of mysteries lay at the lowest nodes. I wanted to see what nodes were the first ones to be created, who created them, and what they said. So I systematically requested to see in order nodes zero through 128. 128 was a nice power of two and a good stopping point, though I doubt I've made much of a dent in uncovering the truth beneath the Monastery's foundations. I list them here in order for your viewing pleasure. Hopefully my friends, I will not be expelled for such a brash act of searching as I have done here this eventide. May you read this in good health, and indeed, may you read this and let it not be censored.

  • 0: The Monastery Gates
    Not even one node in and we're presented with an interesting connundrum. This is not the node that we come to when we first come to the site. If you click the login button it says that the last node is 131. So what is the purpose of this node zero that is pretending to be the main gates? Is it vestigial? Does it have unstable code?
  • 1-17: Forbidden (to Wombat)
  • 18: Form Container by gods
    Is a few lines of code which look like the forms used here. The submit value of "sexisgood" is passed as the checking parameter, perhaps to shore up some exploits. The "sexisgood" submit name parameter is used for adding keywords to nodes. ("sexisgreat" is used for submitting votes) I speculate that some sort of shtml thing is going on when building the pages dynamically and this thing is called in a function to assemble the framework for the nodes. This node also referes to a general container found at node 19.
  • 19: General Container by gods
    The genral container here seems to work in automatically setting the theme if monks have it set other than the default. It claims to be a child of the monktainer in node 492.
  • 20: nodelet container by root
    This seems to be the code for automatically building the nodelets on the right side of the screen. My studies later revealed that nodes are in fact built dynamically using other nodes as the template rather than having code hardwired into the instance of the engine, or in config files on the server.
  • 21: nodeletshadow container by gods
    How many of you notice the very slight ring around the nodelets that's the same color as the shaded pars in a thread? (ie title, date, replies and poster.) I didn't until now. :-)
  • 22: stdcontainer by gods
    This seems to hold the header and footer of the page. It does the opening and closing tags, including basichead and userbody in the code. Both of these lead to forbidden nodes.
  • 23: Everything 2 idea list by gods
    Truly one of the priceless gems that the Monastery houses. Cogitations and murmurings about the Everything 2 engine back in the beforetime, Oct 4th 1999. Oh the things that happened that day. All these fundamental nodes were posted. The site came to be, and all this nifty stuff happened. Do you remember where you were when they shot Kennedy? How about on Oct 4th 1999?

    This node is fascinating. The author talks about a rudimentary genetic algorithm to have links evolve and keep only the most relevant ones around. It talks about the initial form of the chatterbox, and the msg system. The author dismisses it as "Too much right now" and says it's "just a thought".
    Now one interesting thing I saw was a note at the bottom in the section talking about htmlcode, where it says "Restrict dupes default on." If it defaults to on then why do sometimes have the problem of newbies posting multiple times?! If it is turned off then what happened to make it turn off?
  • 24: Everything 2 TODO list by root
    A todo list relating to the Everything 2 site. I don't visit Everything 2, though I have an account there, so this isn't very meaningful to me aside from its novelty. It's still a nifty little item.
  • 25-82: Forbidden
  • 83: Noisy Sunset by gods
    A very nice image of something exploding, in a myriad of warm colors. It's quite a work of art. Nice use of filters and plugins. There is a caption at the bottom that says "hi mom. I like this!"
  • 84: htmlvars nodegroup
    A key point in the quest. At this node, we discovere the archtypes for all other nodes, including "The Default Node" which claims to be the source of all new nodes. We find the archtype for permission denied messages at 2294. Search results at 864, and search results when duplicates were found at 102. This also shows some of the classifications that are in use here. In parens after each node is a description of what it is. The first four are labeled (superdoc) while Guest User is a user, and node_locked at 100 is a "restricted_supernode" going there gets a permission denied message. One can only imagine what treasures lurk back there.

    It also pains me to say that I found taint in the Monastery. At the bottom of the htmlvars nodegroup is a link to "launch editor." It is written in Javascript. ::Watches as monks gasp in horror, and some of the weaker ones faint dead away:: I'm sorry, but this is what it is. It's my duty as a burrower to report this to you. Clicking on the launch editor button brought up another window which had the aforementioned superdocs in it with four buttons. Delete, up, down, and view. Just in case anything could have been destroyed by my meddling, I only pressed the view button, and found that it was essentially the same as clicking on the link. I did not dare push the up, down or delete buttons. I am certain that measures are in place to prevent accidental destruction, but nonetheless, I did not see any in the Javascript code.
  • 84-95: Forbidden
  • 96: All nodelets by root
    This node is somewhat helpful. It reveals what some of the forbidden nodes are called. 95 is called "Admin nodelet" 87 is "CGI::param". 93 is "server statistics" which I for one would love to see made public. 96 is "other users" presumably code for showing who else is logged in. 90 is "Node statistics" This is probably like the "most visited nodes" but with a LOT more info. 88 is "links" Dunno about this one. The javascript editor is here too and it's functionally identical to the first one.
  • 97: Default nodeltes by gods
    This has stuff we're all familiar with. The XP nodelet, chatterbox, other users, sections, information, your input, leftovers, and the voting booth. All of these links are forbidden so they're probably the protoypical archtypes again. The javascript editor is here as well.
  • 98: System nodelets by gods
    Very similar to Node 96. ALl of the node links are here except for "Node statistics" As in all cases, the editor is here.
  • 101: Create a new user.
    We've all been through this one.
  • 102: Duplicates found
    Supernode for the duplicate search results. From back in the teen range of nodes.
  • 103-105: Missing. Nothing here.
  • 106: The Default Node From which all other nodes are formed. ::Bows head in silence::
  • 107: The Everything Tour
    In their own words, vroom (presumably) gives an overview of the Everything system. Things mentioned are the Gigantic Node Lister, superdoc, the superdoc display page and the superdoc edit page. (All forbidden). I will not repeat what the node said, because it is long and I don't want to. However I caputured it, just in case it "Disappears" after I post this.
  • 108: Missing.
  • 109: Login screen.
    It has my name on it! :-)
  • 110: User variables:
    All the different things that make you you. These are just lines of text with interesting names like fp_poem_off. timezone=-8, codewrapoff, group, and 9488. The variables and their values are specific to each user.
  • 111: Guest User: by vroom
    A user created on 10/4/99. Again the date! 10/4/99 This ties in with the Bavarians, I just know it. Fnord!
  • 112: Missing.
  • 113: root by root
    Root is a mere acolyte? Pshaw! Has 33 writeups to his name. Root's last writeup was on Dec 22, 1999.
  • 114: gods by root
    Thus proving that root is still higher than a god. This is what happens when you click on gods. Presumably if we bribe these people enough, they'll reveal to us the secrets of the forbidden nodes.
  • 115-123: Forbidden
  • 124: Everything 2 Idea List. by gods
    Very much like 23
  • 125: Everything 2 Todo List. by root
    Very much like 24
  • 126: Noisy Sunset by gods
    It was pretty the first time, and it's pretty again. :-) Why are these nodes repeated?
  • 127: The Idea list (again)
  • 128: The Todo list (again)

Edit: Closed some <b> tags. larsen


In reply to The True Catacombs of Perlmonks by wombat

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