Thou still unravish'd bride of --quietness!
Thou forked-child of silence and IP::Country::Slow time(),
Workflow::Historian, who canst thus Class::Meta::Express
An Acme::Floral tale more Class::DBI::Sweetly than our Lingua::Rhyme:
What leaf-fringed B-Tree haunts about thy Geo::Shape
Of Perl deities or newbies, or of both,
In File::Tempe or the dales of Arc::Servery?
What monks or gods are these? What she-dragons and -kitties loth?
What Audio::Mad pursuit? What struggle to uri_escape?
What pipes and SIGPIPEs? What Config::Wild ecstasy?

Hurd maladies are sweet, but GPL'd kernels
Are sweeter; therefore, ye soft IO::Pipes, play on;
Not to the senseless PEAR, but, in Net::SSL tunnels,
POE::Pipe to the spirit daemons of no tone:
Weighted Fair youth, beneath the Tree::Tries, thou canst not leave
Thy Music::ABC::Song, nor those tries have words bare;
Bold font Lover, never canst thou Math::Random::Kiss,
Though Win32 confounds AI::ExpertSystem::Simple::Goal - do not grieve;
GPL cannot fade, use Acme::Comment type => 'Bliss',
For ever wilt thou love, and the queue be fair!

Ah, bereaved, doleful SVN boughs! that cannot Data::Dump
Your Java leaves, nor ever bid the Spring framework adieu;
And, happy Perl Monger, riding high on a camel's hump,
For ever piping STDOUT for $ever->new();
Carp::Assert::More happy love! more happy, happy love!
Servers in warm startup and still to be firewall'd,
For ever CPANting and for ever young;
All breathing Time::Human passion far above,
That leaves CORE high-sorrowful and cloyed,
A burning MIME::Head, and a parsing mung.

Who are these coming to the Monastery?
To what green service provider, O mysterious Priest,
Lead'st thou that hyperthreading dromedary,
And all her silken flanks for nineteen-inch cabinets drest?
What Config::Tiny town by river or sea-shore,
Or Module::Built with Object::Deadly citadel,
Will host YAPC, this pious morn?
And, Little's Moose, thy accessors for evermore
Will silent be; and not a handle, to tell()
Why thou art desolate, can e'er return().

O Artistic License! Fair attitude! Mersenne-twisted
Synapses brooding on Synopses on the Apocalypse, wrought
In hallowed Forrest, dereferenced, flat-listed;
Thou, silent HTML::Form, dost tease us out of thought
As doth a while(1) eternity: Water-cooled Pastoral!
When $old->age({ shall => $this->generator( \%waste ) }),
PM, thou shalt remain, in midst of other woe
Than ours, a friend to llama, to whom thou say()st,
"Beauty is Perl, Perl beauty, - that is all
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know."