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Re^2: "Chuck Norris"-ing code

by JavaFan (Canon)
on Aug 05, 2008 at 11:17 UTC ( #702324=note: print w/replies, xml ) Need Help??

in reply to Re: "Chuck Norris"-ing code
in thread "Chuck Norris"-ing code

  • Chuck Norris can finish an infite loop in 1.3 seconds.
  • Code written by Chuck Norris cannot be optimized.
  • Chuck Norris doesn't need compilers nor editors. He roundhouse kicks the disk and the bytecode appears.
  • Chuck Norris doesn't use GOTO. Code comes to him.
  • Chuck Norris had a brief conversation with Donald Knuth in the early 60s. Donald is still writing about it.
  • Chuck Norris was once angry at the world. So he created Windows.
  • 90% of the worlds spam is handtyped by Chuck Norris. It takes him only 3 minutes.
  • Every time you don't use "use strict" Chuck Norris kills a kitty.
  • All the good code on CPAN has been written by Chuck Norris.
  • Chuck Norris can fill a ZFS in seconds, without boiling his blood.
  • The best compression algorithm in existence are Chuck Norris fists.
  • The one true bracing style is the one Chuck Norris uses.
  • Chuck Norris doesn't use subroutines to break down long streches of code. He roundhouse kicks instead.
  • Every program Chuck Norris has written can be run backwards. It will rollback whatever it did.
  • No matter how you encrypt your traffic, Chuck Norris can read it by just looking at the cable. His ears can intercept wifi transmissions.

Replies are listed 'Best First'.
Re^3: "Chuck Norris"-ing code
by jdporter (Chancellor) on Aug 05, 2008 at 12:57 UTC
    Larry Wall, Randal Schwartz, Damian Conway, and Mark Jason Dominus are merely Chuck Norris sockpuppets.
Re^3: "Chuck Norris"-ing code
by TGI (Parson) on Aug 05, 2008 at 17:13 UTC
        That's only because Bruce Schneider encrypted the first fact. And noone has a computer with large enough memory to hold Bruce Schneiders decryption key, so the first fact will be lost forever (or when Bruce decides otherwise); no point in displaying the encrypted fact.
Re^3: "Chuck Norris"-ing code
by Anonymous Monk on Aug 08, 2008 at 03:18 UTC
    Chuck Norris doesn't debug, his code doesn't have bugs!! But if he is going to debug *your* code he only stares at your screen until every bug squashes itself.

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