While I agree with the overall message you're conveying (which is a nice fit to In defense of civility and In defense of criticism) I must say there is something quite disturbing in having the daily task of checking out who is reading dirty words (...shudder... that's not security that's just plain fascism).

Maybe you can convince your info security people to do a better job of their filtering. I mean you proved to them the validity of this site in your daily job. Shouldn't they grep out perlmonks from their dirty-words report? (Cripes, you probably can't visit slashdot at all).

I was tempted to put George Carlin's "seven dirty words" in this post but since I can appreciate your position, here's the man himself (it's just audio, so let's see that show up) and his expanded list (this one actually contains words but they're of the "medical" variety with the good stuff behind the links).

-derby

update: Maybe PM needs a module like so (dirty words masked for particle's situation).

another update: Changed package name from Carlin2Flanders to just Flanders - sounds better IMHO.

package Acme::Flanders;

use 5.006;
use strict;
use warnings;

require Exporter;

our @ISA = qw(Exporter);
our @EXPORT = qw( repent );
our $VERSION = '0.01';

our %NED_FILTER = (
   's**t' => 'son of a gun',
   'p**s' => 'diddly on',
   'f**k' => 'son of a gun',
   'c**t' => 'diddly on',
   'c********r' => 'son of a gun',
   'm****rf****r' => 'diddly on',
   't**s' => 'son of a gun',
);

sub repent {
   my( $dirt ) = shift;
   my( $key );

   foreach $key ( keys %NED_FILTER ) {
      $dirt =~ s/\b$key\b/$Acme::Flanders::NED_FILTER{$key}/ig;
   }
   $dirt;
}

1;
__END__
=head1 NAME

Acme::Flanders - For I<really> bad potty mouths.

=head1 SYNOPSIS

   use Acme::Flanders;

   print repent("Holy S**t! Batman");

=head1 DESCRIPTION

Be a good child like your parents told you and stop using potty
words. This module will filter a string and replace the seven
dirty words as documented by George Carlin with acceptable cursing
as espoused by Ned Flanders.

=head1 AUTHOR

derby

=head1 COPYRIGHT

 This module is free software. It may be used, redistributed
and/or modified under the terms of the Perl Artistic License
     (see http://www.perl.com/perl/misc/Artistic.html)
[download]