$perform = abs($exercises);
 
$chest   = sqrt($cologne);
eval($self_in_mirror);
 
$stomach = sqrt($cologne);
eval($face_closely_in_mirror);
 
$! = sqrt($cologne);
eval($self_in_mirror);
 
chdir "/usr/local/bar" or die "You're solo tonight, baby: $!\n";
 
while (<BarOpen>) {
        seek $potential, $female, $companionship;
        @Available_Women = map {split ' '} @Women;
 
TARGET: while ($Woman = pop @Available_Women) {
            eval($closest_female);
            gethostbyname($Woman);
 
            # note: women typically interpret the following as crypt($
+BlahBlahBlah, $whatever);
PICKUP_LINE: push @Woman, $pick_up_line[$current];
 
            if ($slapped_face) {
                delete $pick_up_line[$current];
                next TARGET;
            }
            elsif ($rejection) {
                next TARGET;
            }
            else {
                ++$current;
                next PICKUP_LINE;
            }
        }
        connect WITH, $woman if ($she_buys_it);
}
return $home_alone;
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