#! /usr/bin/perl -w


use LWP::UserAgent;
use Carp;
use Mail::Sendmail;

use strict;

my $mood = shift || 'smoove';

# you
my $self = 'Monk';
my $email = 'monk@monastery';

# her
my $chicks_name = 'Chick';
my $her_email   = 'chick@hermail.com';

my @subjects = (
"hey babe...",
"a short message from your lover...",
"just wanted to say hi...",
"oh I love you...",
                );
my $ua = LWP::UserAgent->new();
$ua->agent("MySmooveB/0.1 ");

my @doghouse = ( 'http://www.theonion.com/onion3120/pick_up_phone_3120.html',
                 'http://www.theonion.com/onion3107/baby_please_3107.html',
                 'http://www.theonion.com/onion3402/he_is_no_good_3402.html');

my @smoove = (
               'http://www.theonion.com/onion3102/treat_u_right_3102.html',
               'http://www.theonion.com/onion3114/think_of_you_3114.html',
               'http://www.theonion.com/onion3202/bringiton.html',
               'http://www.theonion.com/onion3213/let_us_freak_3213.html',
               'http://www.theonion.com/onion3313/get_smooved_3313.html'
               );
my @text;

if ($mood =~ /d/) {
    # you're in the doghouse
    foreach my $x (@doghouse) {
        my $req = HTTP::Request->new(GET => "$x");
        my $retval = $ua->request($req)->as_string;
        push (@text, split(/\<p\>/, $retval));
    }
} else {
    # default, is smoove
    foreach my $x (@smoove) {
        my $req = HTTP::Request->new(GET => "$x");
        my $retval = $ua->request($req)->as_string;
        push (@text, split(/\<p\>/, $retval));
    }
}
my @smoove_text;
foreach my $t (@text) {
    next if ($t =~ m/(img src|script|\{|\})/);
    next if ($t eq "");
    $t =~ s/\&quot\;/ /g;
    $t =~ s/\<(\/)?i\>/ /g;
    $t =~ s/\&(\S*)\;//g;
    $t =~ s/\<\/p\>//g;
    $t =~ s/\//\n/g;
    $t =~ s/\./\.\n/g;
    $t =~ s/Smoove B/$self/g;
    my @lines = split(/\n/, $t);
    foreach my $l (@lines) {
        $l =~ s/^\s*//;
        next if ($l eq ".");
        next if ($l eq "");
        push (@smoove_text, $l);
    }
}
my %mail = (
To      => $her_email,
From    => $email,
Subject => $subjects[rand($#subjects)],
Message => $smoove_text[rand($#smoove_text)]
             );

sendmail(%mail) || warn "$!";