sub spit_milk_out_my_nose{
       (my $severity,$msg,$exit,$exit_code)=@_;

       # Insert logic here...
       if ( $severity == 1 ) {
            send_page($msg);
       else {
             send_email($severity,$msg);
       } 
       write2log($severity,$msg);
       
       if ( $exit ) {
          if ( $exit_code ) { 
             display_error_page_exit($exit_code);
          } else { 
             display_error_page_exit(0);
          }
       }
       
}

##</code><code>##

   | hand waving here 
   my $dbh = DBI->connect($connect_string,$user,$password,$options)
                or spit_milk_out_my_nose(SEV1,"Connection error: " . $DBI::errstr,1,-1);

##</code><code>##

my $sth=$dbh->prepare($sql) or 
       spit_milk_out_my_nose(SEV2,
              "Error Preparing:\n" . $sql . "\nDBI returned: \n", $dbh->errstr
        );