I've only been using Perl for a few months and this is my first JAPH. I know chr() and ord() are visible from a country mile away. Any advice on obfuscation would be appreciated. (no need for kid gloves, i can take it)

$q=do{{34195=>"p",27496=>"l",14697=>"e",46098=>"r"}};$c=0;$a.=join("",
+"re
kcahlreprehtonatsuj",map{substr($_,1**1,0**0)}sort(keys %$q));$a=~s/([
+A-Z
a-z]+)//ge;@_ =split(/ */,"kvtubopuifsqfsmibdlfs");$p=(substr($a,$c,0*
+*0)
-1);for($i=(1-(1/(2*(2**7/8))*32));$i<=$#_;$i++){$_.=chr(ord(@_[$i])-1
+);
if($i==$p){print map{ucfirst}$_." ";$_="";$c++;$p+=substr($a,$c,0**0);
+}}
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