You should really have telnet access, but if you don't, it's not that hard to execute perl -v and pipe the output via a cgi script, like:

#!/usr/bin/perl -w

print "Content-Type: text/plain\n\n";
print `perl -v`;
[download]

 
___crazyinsomniac_______________________________________
Disclaimer: Don't blame. It came from inside the void
perl -e "$q=$_;map({chr unpack qq;H*;,$_}split(q;;,q*H*));print;$q/$q;"