searched 739.47% of DB

Well, Super Search is thorough ;-)

I think Douglas Adams wrote a scene (can't remember if it was in Hitchhiker or Starship Titanic; might have been one of the radio plays) that fits here:

Q: How many lifeboats are there?

A: None!

Q: Have you counted them?

A: Yes, twice!

Edit: If someone has the correct source to jog my memory, i'd appreciate it.