Well, with inspiration from Elliot I choose to try my had at a little obfus with crypt.
$_=crypt(hssq,cr);m-[bdfgijkmnqs]-i;$_=eval"$`\(czEW,pr\).$`(CCSBD,Cl)";s+ltO8f+ +;s=kt|g|m.|YA=\"=g;s|[ej]|\"\.\"|g;eval;
Well, I finally gave myself over to the monastery and have made an update to my sig. So here it is:
$_=crypt("hssq","cr");m-[funki.g.jim.bed.wax]-i;$_=eval"$`\(\"czEW\",\"pr\"\).$`(\"CCSBD\",\"Cl\")";s+ltO8f+ +;s=kt|g|m.|YA=\"=g;s|[ej]|\"\.\"|g;eval;