A good point about English was made earlier. Ask him to speak in an algebraically defined language and watch his smirk vanish.

Realistically...I think the algebraic definition of perl exists but cannot be derived, due to the fact that it's an enormous cross-referencing of several extremely complex human systems. ((LarryWall) * (DamianConway) * ... ) = (perl)

Explain that to your friend, and tell him that his limited 'programming languages' are too simple for you. :)

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You are what you think.