in reply to There HAS to be a way to lock files over NFS
As for File::NFSLock... it may be clunky and possibly has bugs in the stale lock time out, but we've hit it with over ten million hits a day on our web cluster (tied to our data cluster via nfs) and we have not had a single problem with inaccurate locking. So - the extras might not work in your situation, but the down and dirty functionality will work.
my @a=qw(random brilliant braindead); print $a[rand(@a)];
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