After asking around in the chatterbox, we decided there was no easy way to do this, but I decided to post anyway.. good poetry doesn't have to make sense, so in a twisted sort of way, perl doesn't have to compile.. I think. Plus, your friends challenged you to have it in a perl script, there's nothing about it working. With that in mind, here goes:

#!/usr/bin/perl -w
use strict;
use constant flock => "goose "x50;
sub the {
  my $geese=flock;
  return $geese;
}
chomp the flock; #there's the problem:  chomp is operating on flock, n
+ot on the returned value of the()
[download]

any ideas, suggestions, comments, at all, are desired.