This one-liner combines the power of bash and perl. It's not suitable as a signature however, as it's not quite portable.

eval perl{\ \''-lne/"(.*','.*)".(...)/x&&%{uc$2}&&print$1'\',\"doc,faq
+1\|\"}
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Update: you have to run this line in bash, and it will run perl, in case you haven't figured it out.

Update: At least four other people has found the same obfu idea. see Just Another JAPH, Opere Citato Japh, JAPF and Perl FAQ.

Update 2008 feb 10: The release of perl 5.10.0 has broken this japh. If you have a perl 5.8.8 or earlier version, use it by changing PATH.