To me, in an ideal space of time, being both effective and polite is obviously the ideal. But when I have time for only one, I pick effective. Some people I know pick polite instead, and those are usually the ones that rag on me when I choose the other. I understand that, because it's a conflict of goals.
But please let me be clear. I will always take the time to be straight with you. I will not always take the time to package it nicely. In the long run, I believe that is what you want. In the short run, I'll take my licks and mop up the mess later.
I would also ask the same in return. If you have something to say to me, I'd rather you be straight than be nice, if you have to choose.
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