That was a SUPER story! Reality Warping Powers are just the BEGINNING though! Among the advantages to coding Perl:
The ability to eat any vegetable without chewing.
Being able to look up entries in the encyclopedia WITHOUT OPENING IT!
Sex Rays...lots and lots of Sex Rays (kind of like pheromones, except with alot of built in functions).
Time control. If you ever run into that problem of going too far back or something, you can use select(undef, undef, undef, $exactTime) instead of sleep($time).