Maybe it's just me but I would design the db first and the object layer second - that way external tools (sql, report builders, etc) do not have to filter through your mapping.
So for your example, I would modify example 1 ... but add a third table called Person and pull the person data out of Death and Wedding:
Table:Death Table:Wedding Table::Person
----------- ------------- -------------
death_id wedding_id person_id
person_id groom_id firstname
short_obit bride_id surname
obituary message_from_couple
flowers details
charities date_of_wedding
date_of_death
Where groom_id and bride_id are foreign keys into Table:Person
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