Re: •Re: Re: Stereotypes

Never thought that I'd get into this here, but here are my very little 2 cents worth.

Only this: I have had instances in my life where the truth of the situation was hard for other people to swallow (people could not believe that one person could treat another so badly). Because of this they tended to negate my experience (oh you're exagerating, it wasn't really that, it was something else). This caused me no end of pain.

From this I learned a very important lesson. If someone tells me something about their own self, where I know nothing about the situation, I never assume that they are exagerating. (it doesn't mean i'll run out and buy a car because the salesman says he needs the money).

It is important to be believed, unless the unbeliever knows for certain (or at least reasonably certain) that there is cause for disbelief.

This isn't about the big issue of how often or how prevalent discrimination is, it's about simply accepting, at face value, a statement someone has made about their life.

Comment on Re: •Re: Re: Stereotypes

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Re: Re: •Re: Re: Stereotypes by jZed (Prior) on Apr 08, 2004 at 17:23 UTC
Sandy, thanks for a thoughtful and heartfelt response and for calling my attention to this thread. And Sporty, thanks for mentioning the original incident. I think it's really important that there be space in this monastary for each of us to describe how the sofware profession treats us as individuals. What's it like to be a foo Perl progrmmer where foo is a different ethnicity, gender, age, whatever, than I am? I would hope that PM would be one of the places I could start to learn about that. And the other thing is that we are the software profession. If we don't listen when someone says "this is how the profession is treating me", who is going to listen?	[reply]
Re: Re: •Re: Re: Stereotypes by dimar (Curate) on May 20, 2004 at 11:49 UTC
That's what flame wars and endless debates are all about. That's what stereotypes are all about. You have a tool you can use, you have a beacon of truth and light, you have wisdom and compassion for your fellow human, that's nice ... but dont bother me while I'm eating. bias is everywhere greatness and recognition don't always go together for every pair of eyes, there is a different way of seeing the world sometimes 'the best tool for the job' is whichever one pays their rent sometimes 'the best tool for the job' is whichever one strokes their ego honorary titles are niether necessary nor sufficient for open-mindedness no one is free from being looked down upon by at least someone no one is free from being admired or envied by at least someone even a flea-bitten dog is better off than a dead lion nothing is as simple as it appears on the outside for proof, look in the mirror	[reply]
•Re: Re: •Re: Re: Stereotypes by merlyn (Sage) on Apr 08, 2004 at 01:09 UTC
Well, maybe I'm weird, but I do accept that "absolutely true for them" might not mean "universally true". I've just seen too much stuff to contradict that. So I take experiences as such, and also recognize that a lot of what happens is projection and not real. Hence, my pushback. Does it mean that they don't see the world that way? Absolutely not. Does it mean that maybe it happened partly because they have their hand in the matter whether aware or not? That's when I will say "dunno, but worth looking at". Put another way, many of the negative experiences we encounter each day, month, year, are perhaps a self-fulfilling prophecy. Does that make it any less real? No. But to continually be in denial that we might be the proverbial accident-waiting-to-happen, really doesn't do anyone much good. So, I poke a bit. I wanna know. I've discovered a lot of things about myself by such poking, so I also poke others likewise. Natural reaction. {grin} -- Randal L. Schwartz, Perl hacker Be sure to read my standard disclaimer if this is a reply.	[reply]