If you relax some of the requirements the code below comes in at 147

$_="123
456
789 147,258,369,159,357";
sub d{/.{12}/s;print$&.($p=
$p?0:X);die$_ for@_}d;
while(<>=~/\d/&&s/$&/$p/g){
/$p{3}/?d$p:!/\d/ ?d"Tie":d
}
[download]

The relaxation's are you automatically lose if you try to cheat :-P i.e; given invalid input UPDATE: this can be remdedied with a goto but that brings it up to 153. The output is a little jury-rigged. I use 0 instead of O to allow for some shaving. Also, instead of where you die $p, the loser dies in this game.

UPDATE 2: 144

$_="123
456
789 147,258,369,159,357";
sub d{/.{12}/s;print$&.(
$p=$p?0:X);@_&&die@_}d;
while(<>=~/\d/&&s/$&/$p/g){
/$p{3}/?d$p:!/\d/?d"Tie":d
}
[download]

I should mention, I really like the way you use $_. It takes a double-take or two to figure out what's going on but it's rather elegant.