Incidental trick, there is not need to use "0 but true" since "0.0" has the exact same effect. (Note that the quotes matter.)
I'm not sure how that would run under flea-bitten corpses of dead camels though. (Can you tell that I'm somewhat flabbergasted at your using a version of Perl that is about a decade out of date?)
Rest assured that I don't normally live in such third-world Perl environs. I'm only here for a week, and it hasn't been until today that I've needed Perl, so it hasn't been as horrible as it sounded.
We're not really tightening our belts, it just feels that way because we're getting fatter.