in reply to A short, "iffy" rant
The first objection I can see to your "use a hash!" advice is something like "Oh, but there's way too much code inside the if/elsif/else blocks; no way can I do everything with a hash lookup!" That just doesn't hold. If the spec's so malleable that you're hacking up your if blocks and adding tons of special cases, you should probably be using a dispatch table instead.
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Yours in pedantry,
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