I'd use the following:

% find -ls | awk '{print $7,$11}' | sort -rn
3093645 ./.perl/OLD_SITE/SOAP.tar.gz
97879 ./humor/dork2.jpg
87223 ./tmp/hat_puzzle.jpg
76110 ./.bin/webwatch/.log
55080 ./documentation/PerlTK-reference.zip
43704 ./documentation/perldoc/perlsub.pod
39424 ./NROTCURPI/invite.doc
33042 ./humor/dork1.jpg
[etc...]
[download]

You may need to fiddle with awk somewhat there. For me, this ran in 1.11 seconds. Faster than anything you could muck up in Perl, I'm sure.