What I am saying when it doesn't work is that it doens't work

How do you know it "doesn't work"? By what standard are you measuring it? How are you sure it's not doing exactly what you told it to do?

The problem is that nothing "doesn't work". It only does something. We're asking you what it is doing, and how that differs from what you wanted or expected.

-- Randal L. Schwartz, Perl hacker