This doesn't even look remotely like Perl:

sub open_report
 {
   my $sgv = $dbh->prepare("show variables");
   $sgv->execute();
          while (my $gv=$sgv->fetchrow_hashref())
{
 %MySQL_Variables{@gv[0]} = @gv[1];(is there a systax err here)
Then to use a mysql item in perl use 
%MySQL_Variables{"uptime"}
             }
$sgv->finish();
}
[download]

but from our chat at the Chatterbox, I think this is more like what you want:

sub open_report
 {
    my $sgv = $dbh->prepare("show variables");
    $sgv->execute();
    %MySQL_Variables = ();
    while (my($name, $value) = $sgv->fetchrow_array())
    {
       $MySQL_Variables{$name} = $value; # is there a systax err here
       # Then to use a mysql item in perl use 
       # $MySQL_Variables{"uptime"}
    }
}
[download]