I suppose that I should clarify that this isn't for when my scripts die of natural causes, but when I kill them myself, i.e.:

open ... or &dienice("Can't open: $!");
[download]

Or for viewing troubleshooting data:

&dienice(@troubleshooting_data);
[download]

Perhaps I should rename the sub killnice, or maybe KillingMeSoftly?

*Music plays in the background*

Strumming my pain with his routine
Singing my life with his code
Killing me softly with his sub...