If what you really want is a crash course in Perl, may I suggest contacting the fine folks at Stonehenge Consulting?

They do Perl training and consulting. They even write books on Perl. If anyone really needs a crash course, these guys could deliver for the right price.

I don't work there (and probably never will be qualified to do so) and I've yet to be a client. I don't get any consideration for this recommendation. I do own copies of a few books by their people, read lots of what they write online and in magazines, and respect them very much. I've also contributed a bit to a fund when one of them needed a hand, as I'm sure many here did. If I was going to pay for a crash course in learning about Perl, Stonehenge is probably where my money would go.