Perl 6 ! ; )

    my sub thingie is rw {
        return my $var
            is Proxy( for => $hidden_var,
                      FETCH => { ... },
                      STORE => { ... },
                      TEMP  => { ... },
                      ...
            );
    }
[download]

see Apocalypse 6

But I'm not sure if it is really faster than what we already have in modules like Contextual::Return.

Depends on how fast ties are realised in p6...