When you find yourself in a flamewar, I recommend three simple steps to get it over with.

The Three Simple Steps:

1. Write your response.
2. Read your response.
3. Delete your response.

The best way to avoid misunderstandings is to modify the above process. Repeat the Online Dialog Two Step as necessary (I recommend ~4 times).

The Online Dialog Two Step

1. (re)Write your post/email.
2. Wait one minute and read your post/email.

This technique works well for me, when I follow it. I don't come off as anywhere near as much of an asshole online ;)

TGI says moo