Have I met a Nemesis in each online community? No, I wouldn't say that. I have had uncomfortable and difficult moments from time to time. However, I can't say there are people I've actively disliked.

Granted, there are people I disagree with. I've done and said things I later regretted. There have been flame wars, shouting matches, and so on. However, I've (almost) always tried to conduct my online activities with a general sense of respect for the leaders, the regulars, and the newbies of the various communities.

But, by turning your question around, I can say that I've had similar experiences in my online wanderings. In each community that I return to regularly, I've been fortunate to meet people I can respect, people who know more about various things than I do, people willing to share that knowledge and to help others gain their levels of mastery. People I consider "friends." That's certainly true here.

Perhaps it's a slight difference in perception. I don't know. I do know, or rather I strongly suspect, that you will find what you're looking for and you receive what you give. If you help people, they'll be more willing to help you. If you respect them, they'll be more inclined to treat you with respect.

You may be right; everyone may have a Nemesis in online communities. After all, we're still dealing with people and certain personalities will always clash.

However, I believe that it's far easier to find Partners in online communities.

In a larger sense, I believe this applies to any situation where people interact, not just online ones. It seems more pronounced online because people tend to feel more anonymous and are therefore more expressive in their opinions and their "actions." However, I believe that same perception adjustment can help your dealings with your coworkers, family, community, and social circles. If you look for flaws, you will certainly find them. In doing so, however, you risk overlooking the virtues.

Offense, dislike, distaste, emnity, antipathy, and even outright hatred all require active maintenance on your part. These aren't bad or invalid emotions. Indeed, we have them for very real and sometimes very good reasons. If, however, you actively maintain those emotions over time, you may end up wasting energy that could be better invested. Doing so may prevent you from accomplishing other, perhaps more important or more wondrous achievements.

What if you channeled that same amount of energy into repairing the rift? What possibilities might you achieve? Perhaps nothing...perhaps something far more than you can imagine.

I suspect we've all encountered situations where we've disliked someone because of an unguarded word or thoughtless deed. Or perhaps we've been disliked because of something we've done. Some of you may have even taken the time to repair such things and discovered that the causes of such disfavor were petty, based on misunderstandings, or taken completely out of context.

I realize this isn't precisely the sort of thing you're talking about. I've noticed that I tend to dislike people for really petty reasons. I don't like that about myself, so I'm a little sensitive to the possibility of it in others. (Please note that I'm speaking in a general, rather than specific, sense.)

I don't know the person you're (not) speaking of, nor have I noticed the disagreements you've alluded to. However, given certain recent discussions about the dangers of being taken out of context, as well as discussions about the importance of questioning one's opinions, I wonder if one's true Nemesis is the one facing you in the mirror each morning.