Thank you. I don't think that the loop is going to be a problem as my coding logic was more along the lines of:

Test
if good then sleep
if not good then dial, send message, hangup
loop
[download]

However, the system configuration is where I'm having the trouble. I was hoping some adventurous monk had written a module that would do something similar to this, but alas it appears my hopes are in vain.

As for SMS, my boss is too cheap and paranoid to pay for text messaging on our phones, so I'm stuck with Google Voice which does not have an email-to-text gateway.