Been a rough week. Here is an attempt to try to let the emotions out.

use Time::Local; my $wife = {}; my $self = {}; my $kids = 3; my $time = time; flashback: { my $time = Time::Local(0,0,16,13,8,104); # Wife finds out something... $kids++; $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids}++; # Then tells me... $self->{knowledge}->{numkids} != $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids}; $self->{knowledge}->{numkids} = $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids}; # My emotions are all over the map... foreach (0..50) { $self->{$_}++ foreach (qw(shock joy anticipation fear)); } } pain: { my $time = Time::Local(0,0,9,15,8,104); # Then, wife starts feeling large amounts of pain... $wife->{pain}++ foreach (1..2); # On a scale of 1..10 $wife->{location} = 'doctor'; # ... we find out some potentially bad news (need # second opinion) ... $kids--; # ... and my emotions go numb ... $self->{$_} = 0 foreach (qw(shock joy anticipation fear)); $self->{numbness} = 1; # To deal, I start doing what needs doing... $self->{adrenaline} = 100; # ... get wife to where she needs to go ... $time += 60 * 60 * 3; $wife->{pain}++; $wife->{location} = $self->{location} = 'hospital'; # ... and confirm what we feared ... $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids}--; $self->{knowledge}->{numkids} = $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids}; # emotions release ... $wife->{tears} = 'flow'; $self->{tears} = 'flow'; $self->{sorrow} += 100; # ... and wife condition gets worse ... $time += 60 * 60 * 4; $wife->{pain}++ foreach (4..6); # ... surgery is necessary ... $time += 60 * 60 * .5; $wife->{location} = 'surgery'; # ... not only necessary, but urgent ... $wife->{blood}--; } # Now, things just go day by day. $time = time; $self->{tears} = (rand > .8) ? 'flow' : 'dry'; $wife->{tears} = (rand > .6) ? 'flow' : 'dry'; $self->{sorrow} = 25;

Update (Sep 18, 2004, 16:23 CST6CDT): Updated with comments to "explain code". Still have a hard time talking about this, but the more I talk, the more it seems to help with the emotions.

Update (May 15, 2006, 12:22 CST6CDT): Browsing some of my old code. I am far enough detached from this now to explain it. Within a small amount of time, I found out I was going to be a daddy for the fourth (well, 2 and 3 were twins, so third) time. A short time later, we discovered that the child implanted in the tube (ectopic pregnancy), and we lost the child early on. In case you cannot tell, my family is my reason, and this hit me quite hard. Thanks all for your kind thoughts and responses.

--MidLifeXis

Replies are listed 'Best First'.
Re: Catharsis
by radiantmatrix (Parson) on Sep 20, 2004 at 16:50 UTC
    $me->feel($you->{pain}); push @u_family, $you, $u_wife, $you->{family}; bless @u_family;
    --
    $me = rand($hacker{perl});

      /me thanks you.

      --MidLifeXis

Re: Catharsis
by Aristotle (Chancellor) on Sep 18, 2004 at 20:55 UTC

    It's not easy to follow what happened, but that might be intentional. In any case, I hope things get better soon.

    Makeshifts last the longest.

Re: Catharsis
by chanio (Priest) on Sep 19, 2004 at 02:27 UTC
    I am sorry for that, also!

    But your art is to get compassion from a PC.

    Hope you'll overcome all these.

    You might apreciate reading some texts at my site (I need more practice with perl 'though) where you might search for some words of hope...

    .{\('v')/}
    _`(___)' __________________________
    Wherever I lay my KNOPPIX disk, a new FREE LINUX nation could be established.