The obvious way to do this would be to sort your email addresses, and then mail them in small batches.
I used to run a script which notified livejournal users of changes to their friends lists - this sent a mail a day if there was a change, and on average used to send 2000 mails.
I set the script up so that rather than sending 2000 mails en masse, it would sort them and I had some cron jobs setup to process 'a-k', 'k-o', and 'o-z' individually.
This way rather than one big burst you only had three smaller ones.
If this isn't appropriate for you you could do something kludgy like "mail user; sleep(60); mail next user".
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