Hacker working on a project to get firewall on every machine in company sees another project to get inventory data on every machine in the company. Suggests merging the two projects to avoid overlapping. Is told that company has tool to avoid a visit to each machine. When said tool fails to fix inventory data hacker is asked to help. Hacker has already writen code to scan network and keep track of assets on the network, takes the db from this and goes and scans all machines updating data on the go. Hacker says project should take 10 to 15 weeks is given 5 weeks and is screamed at when data is still not complete.

You will always work for idiots, give up all hope and just talk on perlmonks all day. When they fire you for slacking it is better than being fired for not meating unreasonable time scales that you told were unreasonable from the beginning.