Oh my children, what shall I do?

It seems I was presumptuous - it transpires my children have gone from killing each other to becoming pharasees, religiously quoting scriptural CODE(0xHHHHHH) references without following or understanding the purpose of my anonymous subroutine I assigned them

This:

$unique_offering = sub {
    require Digest::MD5;
    require Math::Prime::Util;
    return Math::Prime::Util->todigitstring(
    Math::Prime::Util->fromdigits(
    Digest::MD5->md5_hex($harvest), 16), 36);
};
[download]

now produces this:

$unique_harvest # "CODE(0xHHHHHH)"

I desire self expressions of love, not robots...
I have studied the scriptures of other faiths, but I have not found any answers :-/