in reply to When do you step in, and why?

Turn that around.

I firmly believe that it is good to let people fail. Let them be stuck, and stay there for a good long while. Offer them advice on how to get out of it, but let them get good and far into their current trap before sitting down and forcing them to take that advice.

Otherwise they don't have the perspective to really listen or learn.

Of course you try to have them learn on something without major consequences. If the consequences are more important than their learning, then step in sooner. (Be aware that you may very well put the friendship under considerable strain, or else induce an unhealthy dependency by intervening.)

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Re^2: When do you step in, and why?
by atcroft (Abbot) on Jul 21, 2002 at 16:00 UTC

    Reminds me of what a professor did in one of my college classes, an algorithms analysis class.

    The first assignment we received was a problem that many of us wondered why she was giving us so long (2 weeks) to complete, as simple as it sounded: given a group of entries, their weight and values, what was the combination below a certain weight that would give the most value?

    It was after she took up our programs that she told us that it was called the "knapsack problem," one of a class of problems called NP-complete, and that one of the data samples had been designed specifically to approach the CPU time limit for users of our user group. After that, most of us never underestimated the projects we were given in that class.

    I disagree only in one point-at the point they are in the trap you mentioned that deeply, either they will accept your advice without force, or they will reject it completely, feeling it a challenge to their knowledge that they must overcome without help. Many times they will reach a point at which they will be asking around for help, if they realize how deeply they are in it (and the subject isn't classified or need-to-know, such as the automated system for initiating a SCRAM(1) in a PWR(2) based on instrument readings in something like the last situation given).

    1. SCRAM - the sudden but complete shutdown of a reactor , usually when when an abnormal situation has occurred, normally by the complete insertion of special control rods designed to quench the reaction. (3)
    2. PWR - pressurized water reactor; a nuclear reactor in which coolant (water) in the core is maintained in a closed-loop at higher temperatures and under pressure, and is piped through a heat-exchanging system to produce steam in a second, isolated loop for the steam turbines. This differs from a BWR (boiling water reactor), in which the coolant (water) in the core boils, with the steam from the core going directly to the steam turbines.
    3. And no, I'm not a nuclear engineer-the subject just fascinated me when I was younger.
[reply]
      I agree and disagree on your disagreement. :-)

      I agree that they often get into a trap where they absolutely must accomplish it themselves. And they can be there for a long time. But if you are willing to wait a month or 2 (literally!), I believe that frustration will eventually get them to a point where you can sit down, assist in breaking the task into smaller pieces, and get them moving forward.

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