Been a rough week. Here is an attempt to try to let the emotions out.

use Time::Local;

my $wife = {};
my $self = {};
my $kids = 3;
my $time = time;

flashback: {

    my $time = Time::Local(0,0,16,13,8,104);

    # Wife finds out something...
    $kids++;
    $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids}++;

    # Then tells me...
    $self->{knowledge}->{numkids} != $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids};
    $self->{knowledge}->{numkids} = $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids};

    # My emotions are all over the map...
    foreach (0..50) {
        $self->{$_}++ foreach (qw(shock joy anticipation fear));
    }
}

pain: {
    my $time = Time::Local(0,0,9,15,8,104);

    # Then, wife starts feeling large amounts of pain...
    $wife->{pain}++ foreach (1..2); # On a scale of 1..10
    $wife->{location} = 'doctor';

    # ... we find out some potentially bad news (need
    # second opinion) ...
    $kids--;

    # ... and my emotions go numb ...
    $self->{$_} = 0 foreach (qw(shock joy anticipation fear));
    $self->{numbness} = 1;

    # To deal, I start doing what needs doing...
    $self->{adrenaline} = 100;

    # ... get wife to where she needs to go ...
    $time += 60 * 60 * 3;
    $wife->{pain}++;
    $wife->{location} = $self->{location} = 'hospital';

    # ... and confirm what we feared ...
    $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids}--;
    $self->{knowledge}->{numkids} = $wife->{knowledge}->{numkids};

    # emotions release ...
    $wife->{tears} = 'flow';
    $self->{tears} = 'flow';
    $self->{sorrow} += 100;

    # ... and wife condition gets worse ...
    $time += 60 * 60 * 4;
    $wife->{pain}++ foreach (4..6);

    # ... surgery is necessary ...
    $time += 60 * 60 * .5;
    $wife->{location} = 'surgery';

    # ... not only necessary, but urgent ...
    $wife->{blood}--;
}

# Now, things just go day by day.
$time = time;
$self->{tears} = (rand > .8) ? 'flow' : 'dry';
$wife->{tears} = (rand > .6) ? 'flow' : 'dry';
$self->{sorrow} = 25;

[download]

Update (Sep 18, 2004, 16:23 CST6CDT): Updated with comments to "explain code". Still have a hard time talking about this, but the more I talk, the more it seems to help with the emotions.

Update (May 15, 2006, 12:22 CST6CDT): Browsing some of my old code. I am far enough detached from this now to explain it. Within a small amount of time, I found out I was going to be a daddy for the fourth (well, 2 and 3 were twins, so third) time. A short time later, we discovered that the child implanted in the tube (ectopic pregnancy), and we lost the child early on. In case you cannot tell, my family is my reason, and this hit me quite hard. Thanks all for your kind thoughts and responses.

--MidLifeXis

In reply to Catharsis by MidLifeXis

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