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damned solutions

by dries (Novice)
on Jan 05, 2001 at 08:10 UTC ( [id://49994]=perlmeditation: print w/replies, xml ) Need Help??

Is it just me or do programmers always curse when they found a solution instead of when stumble upon a problem?

Replies are listed 'Best First'.
Re: damned solutions
by footpad (Abbot) on Jan 05, 2001 at 08:56 UTC
    Depends on the problem. Depends on the solution.

    Some problems are worth swearing over; others simply result from demented imaginations.

    Similarly, some solutions are so trivial, you *have* to cuss. ("D'oh!") And, some solutions (sadly, not many of mine) are so elegant, well, a well placed epithet is the only way to respond. ("Whoa!")

    I forget where I first saw it, but the following quote comes to mind: "Profanity: the only language all programmers speak."

    --f
Re: damned solutions
by clemburg (Curate) on Jan 05, 2001 at 14:36 UTC

    Long, long ago I heard this saying:

    What is the common language of all programmers? Aaaaaahhhhhhh ...

    Christian Lemburg
    Brainbench MVP for Perl
    http://www.brainbench.com

Re: damned solutions
by Blue (Hermit) on Jan 05, 2001 at 19:47 UTC
    I will often alternate between cajoling whatever I'm working on to function and cursing an artistic blue streak, often focusing on the shortcomings of it's parents/ancestors. Of course, since I usually consider myself the "parent" of my code, is an interesting psychological experience.

    "Come on, you motherless son of a goat-whore. Work or I'll not only remove you, I'll remove your entire directory. The sooner you work, the sooner I'll stop slapping you about with vi. Just one last bug, baby, this should be it. You're gonna work now, aren't you. You know you want to."

    Perhaps I should seek professional help. {grin}

    =Blue
    ...you might be eaten by a grue...

Re: damned solutions
by chorg (Monk) on Jan 06, 2001 at 00:20 UTC
    Well, it works like this for me:

    • Get the project, swear about the time
    • Plan the project - curse about the unknown options
    • Coding - swear all the time, for better or for worse
    • Breaks - go outside and howl obscenities at the stars (you know that nightime is the time when you can create, as opposed to patch)
    • Complete the project - swear that "We'll do it differently next time"

    _______________________________________________
    "Intelligence is a tool used achieve goals, however goals are not always chosen wisely..."
Re: damned solutions
by mrmick (Curate) on Jan 05, 2001 at 18:36 UTC
    The cursing is usually accompanied by a quick and emphatic slap to the forehead with the heel of one's hand.

    If we're gonna do it ... may as well do it with style. :-)

    Mick
      This reminds me of the old programming joke.
      Why do programmers have flat heads?
      Slap the forehead as described above.
Re: damned solutions
by PsychoSpunk (Hermit) on Jan 05, 2001 at 22:56 UTC
    Sounds like a good day at work, if all you hear is enough to make even Andrew Dice Clay blush. I tend to yell at my code when it makes me spend an hour hunting down trivial stuff. More often, though, I suggest unusual punishment to my boxen when they start to act up.

    One time, I did find myself having to backtrack on the threat. I was working on a Win2K box at home, and I told it that if it didn't start doing what I expected, I'd install Linux onto it. At which point, I realized that the hardware probably would love that, and I should really be addressing the OS.

    ALL HAIL BRAK!!!

Re: damned solutions
by Cybercosis (Monk) on Jan 06, 2001 at 13:48 UTC
    Oh the curses that could be heard by anybody standing just out side of Operations! Particularly when one of us poor developers (who shall remain nameless) was issued a computer with a loose something-or-other, which actually *required* physical violence to make it work. Every time he rebooted, he would have to literally bend his box over and spank it! You know, it's probably a good thing that we always (okay, usually) played our music loud enough to drown out the cursing. *gryn*
    ~Cybercosis
(crazyinsomniac) Re: damned solutions
by crazyinsomniac (Prior) on Jan 06, 2001 at 08:15 UTC
    Since I swear all the damn time, i don't really notice it when i code, since i'm usually at home, or in a cublicle or something, but when i do notice, it is amusing %)

    My favorite code swear
    when i do good:
        HELL YEAH!!!
        DAMN STRAIGHT!!!
        FUKC YEAH!!!
        AHHHHH, HAAAAHAAAAAHAAA!!!
        MUWAHAHAAAAA!!!
        UH, UH, *DO A LITTLE DANCE*, YEEEEAAAAH!

    when i do bad:
        SIHT, FUKCING SIHT!!!
        COD DAMN SIHT!!!
        UH, UH, *DO A LITTLE DANCE*, FUUUUUUUUUUKC!!!
        UH, UH, *DO A LITTLE DANCE*, SIHHHHHHHHHHT!!!
        UH, UH, *DO A LITTLE DANCE*, FUUKCING SIHT!!!

    "cRaZy is co01, but sometimes cRaZy is cRaZy".
                                                          - crazyinsomniac

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